'Turning Points' ~ Learning and Giving
This story was told to Galina and Marcia
Tom Fencil was born in the kitchen of a tenant house in Northern New York. When his father returned from WWII his parents’ marriage didn’t fare well. His parents divorced, and the court placed Tom in a Catholic orphanage. When his mother re-married, he lived with his stepfather’s extended family.
Tom was a popular kid in school. He played sports and, most importantly, the girls liked him. He eked by on the bottom of his class. He had no college aspirations, but after passing a sign that said, “Join the Coast Guard”, he signed up. The Coast Guard was eye-opening for Tom. He had never flown on an airplane, and had never met anyone like his Drill Instructor.
Tom tested well in boot camp, and was allowed to choose what he wanted to do in the Coast Guard. He spent six months at medical corpsman school and eventually attained the designation of “independent corpsman”, which meant he required no physician oversight while at sea and there was trust in his role.
He served on Coast Guard cutters in the mid-Atlantic and was later stationed in Libya on a Long Range Aid to Navigation (LORAN) system. Tom loved learning about the Arabic and Islamic culture and was popular among the Libyans. “I was always so impressed with the culture, particularly by how important the family was. It was the center of everything.”
After five years, Tom entered the State University of New York at Oswego. He studied hard, worked hard and, most important of all, met his wife, Kathy. His veteran experience and grades competition with Kathy led to his summa cum laude undergraduate degree.
Following graduate school and an internship, Tom made college administration his career, which included being Dean of Men at the University of Rhode Island, then student affairs and fund raising positions at several colleges and universities.
After Tom retired, he eventually made his way back to the classroom environment, this time as a volunteer in grades two through four.
At his 50th high school reunion, Tom re-connected with Bob, a classmate with whom he had played sports. A few years later, Tom heard that Bob was in a hospice facility. “It was a beautiful place,” he says. On a five-hour drive home, Tom decided to learn more about hospice care. He took the training with Home Health & Hospice Care of Merrimack, NH and has served in a number of capacities, including sitting vigil, and visiting with home patients and veterans.
Like so many other times in his past, Tom enjoys what he is doing, and is happy to go wherever he’s needed.
It’s 2021: “You must not ever stop being whimsical”, Mary Oliver
Galina’s View
I see Tom as a Giver with the appreciation to Life, People, and Integrity. His heart is open to new experience, understanding of cultures and relationships.
There is a Rainbow of love, and Tom embraces each turn in his life. The Stairs of learning and Giving don't have limits.